Therapy for couples
Couples therapy is a good opportunity when couples need support
to be able to return to a relationship which is fulfilling for both
partners. Sometimes it can also be a process of finding out whether
staying together makes sense.
For 15 years now I have worked with couples at counselling centres
and at my own practice, and I experience working with them as a
special challenge which holds a great deal of potential.
Couples usually come with a need to develop more love and harmony
in their partnership so that a good relationship becomes possible
The following questions arise: What can we do to improve the quality
of our life together? How can we discover new ways of meeting each
other anew? How can we learn to do things together again which used
to be fun – or to discover completely new or previously unknown
I try to tap into the resources of the couple, their strengths and
abilities. There was often a time in which many things functioned
well. Sometimes there are still areas in which love and cohesion
can be perceived even now.
If a couple decides to split up, therapy can help them to go their
separate ways positively and without resentment.
Frequent themes in therapy for couples are:
- the wish to solve specific problems
- too much conflict and arguments
- a need for tenderness
- sexual problems
- a desire to have children
- being parents together, issues related to bringing up the children
- How do we define ourselves as a couple within the larger family?
- How do we retain our togetherness in spite of stress and everyday
- How much freedom or closeness should there be in our relationship?
In phases of life when changes are taking place due to a new work
situation, moving, the birth of a child, children leaving home,
or retirement, relationships are subject to greater strain and sometimes
require external help to adapt to the changed circumstances without
losing each other.
If the couple wishes to work on improving the quality of their relationship,
systemic couples therapy offers many ways of finding joint solutions.